Often we feel left behind with the lives of others who can do this and that. Coupled with the presence of social media that allows friends to make status about the holiday weekend, buying a home, engagement or wedding. Sometimes we feel left behind with the people around in this life.
Then we compare ourselves with others. This is certainly very dangerous. Because there will be pressure to maintain how others live their lives compared to our own desires. It can make us feel depressed and lose our focus on our goals and our way of life.
Perhaps you are wondering, why comparing yourself with others is dangerous?
The reason, you will never win when compared with others. This is because humans tend to make comparisons with someone who is already far above himself. Therefore, if you want to compare compare with your former self.
If comparing and measuring ourselves with others will tend to make us feel less than we have. Therefore, if you have been doing so, from now on stop.
According to social comparison theory. Basically, we are social beings and we have an extraordinary need to understand ourselves in the world. This includes the people around us and especially the closest colleagues.
Social comparisons are separated into two categories, ie, downwardly; “Comparing ourselves with someone worse than us.” And upward comparison; “Comparing ourselves with people who are considered better than us.” Both can create problems with how we see ourselves.
While the downward comparison may seem like a way to make us feel better about ourselves, it means we bind our confidence by degrading others. It also causes us to focus too much on the negative aspects rather than looking at the whole.
And, of course, upward comparisons can make us feel motivated and inspired but our negative thoughts tend to sway to encourage jealousy with something unrealistic. This means we are ignoring the complexities of our own lives and focusing on the mainstream of others.
Another problem with comparison allows us not to have a habit of comparing ourselves. Others can have a tendency to show how we are compared to them.
Does it make the choice to not marry or have children, or what career paths we have chosen to follow or not to follow. Most likely there is someone who has opinions and perspectives that contradict him. This has the potential to cause us to doubt ourselves and even consider changing our decisions.
But we must understand the importance of focusing on ourselves because others’ perspective is limited and based on their own opinions and experiences. Most of the time it can be a pure curiosity rather than having a true intention to guide us. This is why it is so important to eliminate the habit of comparing yourself with others.
If you want to compare yourself, you should compare with yourself. Thus you will be motivated to make changes in a sustainable manner. In addition, you will also be more confident, because there has been improvement in you, both from the personal and professional.